I’ve learned these three ideas are true.
1. What I am does not depend on anything I want.
2. Nothing I acquire will change me, because what I am is unconditional.
3. Whatever I become will always start and end with what I am.
Before I learned this, I spent years pursuing one of two objectives:
To make myself look more like the world, or
- To make the world look more like me.
I did this so that I could belong. And I tried hard. If nothing else, I’m a good tryer. But something felt out of sync, and I had a nagging doubt that I was chasing my own tail.
When I slowed down enough, I could sense that underneath all that trying lurked an insecurity. If the world or I needed to change so that I could fit in and belong, then somehow, I must not be OK.
Why was I not OK?
The trouble lay in believing I needed to rise to an occasion whose value I had no say in establishing.
How could I possibly rise to such an occasion? That’s a zero-sum game if there ever was one.
With persistence, reflection – and most importantly, guidance – it began to dawn on me that I didn’t need to feel OK to be OK. If my circumstances couldn’t define who I was, why did I need to belong?
I learned to choose me. First. Even when I didn’t want to. Even when it made me uncomfortable. Even when it scared me.
I realized all I really have to offer is what I am.
And ironically, that was all the world wanted all along.
If I’m truly free to choose, why not choose me?
“Choosing me” is not a path or even a process. It’s an accumulation of guided experiences that gradually become where you’d rather be.
If you’re interested, I can help.
Schedule a free Discovery Chat. Or, send me a direct message, and I’ll get back to you.